A New Cologne Is Coming

A New Cologne Is Coming Out. It's For Cowboys, And It's Made From Cow's Manure. That Way The Women Will Be On You Like Flies!

The Other Guys Are Selling Certainty. Not Me. I'm On The Corner With Doubt.

If You Came Into The Theater Believing In The Talking Snake, It's Kind Of Hard To Leave The Theater Still Believing In The Talking Snake.

When I Hear From People That Religion Doesn't Hurt Anything, I Say Really? Well Besides Wars, The Crusades, The Inquisitions, 9-11, Ethnic Cleansing, The Suppression Of Women, The Suppression Of Homosexuals, Fatwas, Honor Killings, Suicide Bombings, Arranged Marriages To Minors, Human Sacrifice, Burning Witches, And Systematic Sex With Children, I Have A Few Little Quibbles. And I Forgot Blowing Up Girl Schools In Afghanistan.

Rand Paul And Chris Christie Both Said Vaccinations Should Be A Choice, Not A Government Mandate. Because When Have Republicans Ever Told People What They Could Do With Their Own Bodies?