Confidence Is 10 Percent Hard

The Only Way I Could Get Comfortable Around People Was To Make Them Laugh.

North Korea Referred To The Interview As Absolutely Intolerable And A Wanton Act Of Terror. Even More Amazing: Not The Worst Review The Movie Got.

I Want Every Day To Be The Most Boring News Day Ever. I Want Every Day To Be About Spelling Bee Champions And Baby Basketball. It's Better To Have No Comedy Material Than A Horrific News Day.

My Ability To Turn Good News Into Anxiety Is Rivaled Only By My Ability To Turn Anxiety Into Chin Acne.

You All Have Got To Stop Calling Each Other Sluts And Whores. It Only Makes It Okay For Guys To Call You Sluts And Whores.