Don't Ever Put A Guy

I Know Quickly Whether A Guy Is Boyfriend Material. If I Can Have A Good Time Doing Absolutely Nothing With Him, Then That's Boyfriend Material For Me. Like If We're Able To Have Fun At A Gas Station. I've Had Some Really Good Times At Gas Stations.

Nerds Are Far More Interesting Human In Later Life.

You Can Have All This Mismatched Tupperware And Lids, But You Can Never Get Them Sealed Quite Right. That One Edge Always Keeps Popping Up. It's Supposed To Fit, But It Rarely Does. You've Gotta Try A Few Lids Before You Find The One That Actually Snaps.

I Can't Stand When People Use Drugs As An Escape. It's Like, Everybody Suffers. Deal With Your Issues, You'll Feel So Much Better.

You Need To Suffer To Be Interesting.