Don't Hit Women. Never, Ever,

I'm Hooked On Email. That's Right, Kids, I'm One Of You.

That's Why Credit Card Companies Are Evil. Are They Sponsoring The Show Tonight? ... They Are Evil.

According To A New Study, Hawaii Is The Happiest Place In America To Live. And I Thought It Was Just A Great Place To Pretend You Were Born In.

I Proved To My Own Satisfaction That I Am Madder Than I Think.

Fraser's Mother, Janice, Was Actually Quite A Happy Soul But She Had To Hide It Because, Like All Pseudo Intellectuals, She Thought Being Cheery Made Her Look Stupid, Which Of Course She Was For Believing That Rubbish In The First Place. She Like To Talk About Sartre Sometimes, Just As Insurance.