Frank Sinatra Enjoyed My Humor,

I'm Always Watching Films. The Academy Pretty Much Sends Me Every Film That's Ever Been Done. I Enjoy Watching Them, Especially With The People I Know.

Smartphones. Who Cares? Smartphones. I Only Have Dummy Phones.

I've Got An Accountant Who's Been With Me Forty Years. If He Makes A Mistake, He Dies.

In The Old Days, That Was My Ad-lib For Hecklers In The Joints I Worked. It Stuck With Me. I Hardly Say It Now, Say, To Fans, Even Though People Do Send Me Hockey Pucks.

It's Just To Break Things Up Between Stand-up Gigs. I Would Only Do It Periodically. Maybe Just An East Coast Thing.