Give Me A Scotch, I'm

Im Thinking Of Buying A Monkey. Then I Think, Why Stop At One? I Don't Like Being Limited In That Way. Therefore, I'm Considering A Platton Of Monkeys, So That People Will Look At Me And See How Mellow And Well-adjusted I Am Compared To These Monkeys Throwing Feces Around.

I Think That We All Do Heroic Things, But Hero Is Not A Noun, It's A Verb.

There Is Unpanned Gold In Every Soul You Run Into, No Matter What Walk Of Life They Are From.

Violent Ground-acquisition Games Such As Football Are In Fact A Crypto-fascist Metaphor For Nuclear War.

I, Personally, Would Be Shocked If We Went To The End Of The Tape Now And I Didn't Have At Least One... Look, Even If I Don't Get One Directly, Eventually They're Just Going To Have To Give Me One When I Get Old. So No Matter How You Slice It, I'm Getting One.