Hey Birthers, Wanna Hear My

In Ten Muslim Countries You Can Get The Death Penalty Just For Being Gay. If They Were Chopping The Heads Off Of Gay People In The Vatican, Wouldn't There Be A Greater Outcry Among Liberals?

If I Thought The Lord Was Speaking To Me I'd Check Myself Into Bellevue, And I Think You Should Too.

Americans Are Gluttons. We Shop With Forklifts. We Have A Holiday Where We Stuff Food Into Other Food. Our Strippers Wrestle In Jell-o, Where Other Countries Have To Use Mud.

The Media Is All Over This Oui Interview That Arnold Did 25 Years Ago. Now, He's Admitted He Smoked Pot, Had Group Sex And Didn't Mind Dating A Girl That Was Out Of Shape And Kind Of Fat If She Satisfied Him Sexually. So, His Handlers Have Stopped Comparing Him To Reagan And Started Comparing Him To Clinton.

Did You See Britney Spears At The Video Music Awards? I Don't Want To Say That That Performance Was A Disaster, But After The Show, I Saw Rudy Giuliani Having His Picture Taken Standing On Her.