I Admit I Was Drinking

Remember, The Legislature Is The Joke, Not Our Campaign.

I Was So High, I Needed A Stepladder To Scratch My Own Ass.

Friday Night Was The Night Most People Thought They Were Supposed To Have Fun. Trouble Was Most People Didn't Know What Fun Was Or How To Have It, So Things Usually Ended Up Pretty Ugly.

They Probably Would've Taken Jesus If He Hadn't Been Nailed Down.

We're Going To Make That Lone Star Shine Again.