I Can Smell Bullshit From

I Feel Like The Gods Have Certainly Patted Me On The Head.

I Love Singing Along To The Radio While I'm Riding In The Back Of A Squad Car.

In School I Was Pretty Quiet. Kinda Shy Until My Junior Year. But At Home I Was A Freak.

I Was Being Chased By A Giant Crab. That's Not Funny.

When You Get Hit By A Car Sometimes Your Shoes Will Fly Off, Sometimes Your Pants Will Come Off, But I Was Not Fortunate Enough To See The Pants Portion.