I Can't Eat Chicken And

Men Want The Same Thing From Their Underwear That They Want From Women: A Little Bit Of Support, And A Little Bit Of Freedom.

There Is No Such Thing As Fun For The Whole Family.

What's With This Weird Hotel Custom Of Leaving A Piece Of Chocolate On The Pillow? I Awoke Thinking My Brain Had Hemorrhaged Some Sort Of Fecal Matter.

Golf Is The Ultimate Avoidance Activity For The Dysfunctional Dad. A Game So Nonsensically Difficult, So Pointless, So Irrationally Time Consuming, The Word Golf Itself Can Only Stand For ‘get Out, Leave Family.’

A Two-year-old Is Kind Of Like Having A Blender, But You Don't Have A Top For It.