I Didn't Hang Any Pictures

It Looks Like Garbage, My Ass. But Trust Me, You're Lucky It's Not Full-frontal.

I Don't Like Gadgets For Their Own Sake. I Like Gadgets That Are Tools. And I Like Simple Gadgets That Do One Thing Really Well Like A Hammer.

I've Always Defined Myself As A Writer, I've Never Decided What It Was I Was Gonna Write. [...] I Always Fancied Myself One, But I'm Not. I'm So Far From A Writer.

I Am A Man Who Used To Wear The Tights. We Traveled The Country Doing Two Shakespeare Plays For Bored College Students For About A Year. I Think I'd Probably Still Be Doing It Now If I Hadn't Just Randomly Decided To Go To A Sketch Group Audition. That Led To Doing Improv, Which Led To The Daily Show. But It Was Fun While It Lasted.

Ethanol Is, In Its Pure Form, Just As Much Of A Sham As Oil.