I Don't Like Country Music,

I've Been Married Forty-five Years. I Think Laughter Is The Secret.

I Kind Of Do It In My Head, Then I'll Try Pieces Of It On Stage And If It Looks Promising, I'll Put It Together.

All Comedians Are, In A Way, Anarchists. Our Job Is To Make Fun Of The Existing World.

The Giant Superstars Are People Whose Talent Is So Enormous That Their Death Wish Can't Destroy It.

The Problem Is That We Live In An Uptight Country. Why Don't We Just Laugh At Ourselves? We Are Funny. Gays Are Funny. Straights Are Funny. Women Are Funny. Men Are Funny. We Are All Funny, And We All Do Funny Things. Let's Laugh About It.