I Feel Like I've Been

Why Anyone, By Dying, Should Thereby Be Declared Beyond Criticism, Innocent Of Wrongdoing, Suddenly Filled With Virtue And Above Reproach Escapes Me.

While Other Kids Were Out Playing And Doing Healthy Things, I Read An Ancient Judo Book With A Neck Hold That Was Fatal To So Many People They Finally Dropped It From Judo.

It's Lamented That The Youth Get Their News From Jon Stewart And Stephen Colbert. It's Lamentable That They Get More From Them Than From The News.

I Have Never Been Converted To Or Even Had Much Interest In Spiritualism, Occultism, Swedenborgianism Or Any Particular Religion. And I Never, Except Occasionally For A Laugh, Visit The Quacks Who Call Themselves Psychics.

A Biggest Mistake I Made When I Started Doing A Talk Show Was I Thought You Had To Read The Books.