I Have So Little Sex

Emotional Troubles Are Like Landfill. Get Them Outside, And The Air Disintegrates Them.

I've Learned To Have Absolutely No Regrets About Any Jokes I've Ever Done. You Can Tune Me Out, You Can Click Me Off, It's Ok. I Am Not Going To Bow To Political Correctness.

When You First Get Married, They Open The Car Door For You. Eighteen Years Now...once He Opened The Car Door For Me In The Last Four Years - We Were On The Freeway At The Time.

I've Learned: When You Get Older, Who Cares? I Don't Mince Words, I Don't Hold Back. What Are You Gonna Do To Me? Fire Me? It's Been Done. Threaten To Commit Suicide? Done. Take Away My Show? Done! Not Invite To Me To The Vanity Fair Party? I've Never Been Invited! If I Ever Saw The Invitation, I'd Use It As Toilet Paper.

I Like Colonic Irrigation Because Sometimes You Find Old Jewelry.