I Haven't Ever Found Any

Electronic Devices Dislike Me. There Is Never A Day When Something Isn't Ailing.

It's Lamented That The Youth Get Their News From Jon Stewart And Stephen Colbert. It's Lamentable That They Get More From Them Than From The News.

Coming Up Through The Ranks Of Any Calling Can Be Rough, But That Battered Soul Who Survives The Early Years Of Courting The Comic Muse Comes Close To Knowing What Only The Soldier Knows: What Combat Is Like.

I Don't See The Future As Bright, Language-wise. I See It As A Glass Half Empty - And Evaporating Quickly.

The Information Superhighway? That Sounds Like A Place That's Long And Boring And Kills 50,000 People A Year.