I Love The Holiday Season,

Whenever I'm Feeling A Bit Down, I Always Visit The Local Children's Hospital. Knowing That Those Cancer-kids Wont Be Able To Live Long Enough To Surpass Me In Fame Just Warms My Heart, You Know?

I Don't Get Why Arabs Are So Pissed Off At Us. I Mean They Have Enough Oil For All Of Them To Drive A Hummer At What, Maybe 1.50 A Gallon?

When I Think About The Holidays, I Think About The Salvation Army Guys Ringing Bells In Front Of Stores. They're Always So Nice To You And They're Always Willing To Give A Heart To Heart Conversation. They Actually Bear The Winter Cold To Ask For Your Petty Cash With A Smile On Their Face. Fudge Those Guys.

I Mean, So What If It's A Little Dangerous? A One-armed Kid Is Comedy Gold.

Well I Don't Like To Think Too Far Ahead Because It Scares Me A Little To Think Of What This World Will Come To After I'm Gone, But I Suppose Life Will Have To Go On, Right? At Least Everyone Will Still Be Able To Watch Reruns Of Scrubs.