I’m Adorable. I Look Like

I Regard Romantic Comedies As A Subgenre Of Sci-fi, In Which The World Operates According To Different Rules Than My Regular Human World.

When Men Hear Women Want A Commitment, They Think It Means Commitment To A Romantic Relationship, But That's Not It. It's A Commitment To Not Floating Around Anymore. I Want A Guy Who Is Entrenched In His Own Life. Entrenched Is Awesome.

Even In My Revenge Fantasy Where All I Do Is Exercise, I Can Still Do Only Twenty-five Pull-ups. Pull-ups Are Tough, No Joke.

What? I Have A Cold. Don’t Get A Look Of Terror On Your Face. The Worst That Could Happen Is That You’ll Get A Cold, Too. You Don’t Have To Theatrically Purell A Thousand Times A Day And Look All Panicky Every Time I Come Into The Room.

I Feel Like If I Had My Personality But Was An Ob/gyn, You Would Be Psyched. You'd Be Like, 'my Chatty, Pop-culture-interested But Plainspoken, Wants-to-talk-about-clothes But Serious-minded Doctor.' I Feel Like I Would Clean Up With Patients. That's Kind Of A Cocky Thing To Say.