I'm Not So Much A

Valentine's Day Is Celebrated A Little Differently Here In L.a. Nobody Eats Chocolate Because Of The Calories, So People Give Each Other Tofu-shaped Boxes Filled With Bean Curd. Then They Fantasize About What Their Pilates Instructor Would Be Like If He Was Straight.

This Book Could Scare Them. The Sex, The Violence, The Dream Sequences And The Iconoclasm - I Think A Lot Of People Are Uncomfortable With That. I Understand That. It Was Very Uncomfortable To Write Some Of It

Jeb Bush Announced Today On The Internet That He May Run For President. The Next Presidential Election Could Be Bush Vs. Clinton. It Will Be Like 1992 All Over Again Except I Won't Be In Rehab.

Mark Zuckerberg Was Named Time's Person Of The Year. I'm Sorry If You Don't Recognize The Name. A Magazine Is Something People Used To Read.

The Devil Is Not Abroad At Night In The Form Of A Cat Or A Wolf Or Any Other Animal. He Lives Eternally In The Hearts Of Men.