I'm Not So Sure It's

The Average, Healthy, Well-adjusted Adult Gets Up At Seven-thirty In The Morning Feeling Just Plain Terrible.

I Feel About Airplanes The Way I Feel About Diets. It Seems To Me That They Are Wonderful Things For Other People To Go On.

A Lawyer Is Never Entirely Comfortable With A Friendly Divorce, Anymore Than A Good Mortician Wants To Finish His Job And Then Have The Patient Sit Up On The Table.

Man Is The Only Animal That Learns By Being Hypocritical. He Pretends To Be Polite And Then, Eventually, He Becomes Polite.

Children Are Different - Mentally, Physically, Spiritually, Quantitatively, Qualitatively; And Furthermore, They're All A Little Bit Nuts.