I Played A Lot Of

In Episodic Television You'll Have A Good Guy Who's On Every Week And That's His Show! He's The Regular On It, And You're Not Going To Be "gooder" Than He Is; I Mean, He's The Guy Who's Got To Solve Your Problem! So If You're Playing A Good Guy, You Have To Have A Problem, And He's Going To Solve It For You. And The Only Really Strong Dramatic Part Is The Heavy, Because The Meaner And Crueler And Rottener You Are, The Better The Good Guy Looks When He Whips Ya' At The End Because He Always Is Gonna Whip Ya! So, The Best Dramatic Guest Shot Is The Heavy.

Like A Blind Man At An Orgy, I Was Going To Have To Feel My Way Through.

I've Finally Found My Home - As Lt. Frank Drebin.

Truth Hurts. Maybe Not As Much As Jumping On A Bicycle With The Seat Missing, But It Hurts.

Shirley! Don't Call Me Shirley!