I Think A Lot Of

My Mom Always Used To Say, "you Can't Say I Love You Before You Can Say I." And I Think That Sort Of Makes Sense.

Even In My Revenge Fantasy Where All I Do Is Exercise, I Can Still Do Only Twenty-five Pull-ups. Pull-ups Are Tough, No Joke.

When I've Acted, And It's Not Been Something I've Written Or Have Had At Least A Hand In Writing, I Do Think There Is A Controlling Side Of Me That Is Frustrated By That. And I Actually Don't Think That It's A Bad Thing, Because If I'm Going To Be In Movies, In Large Part They're Going To Be Movies That I Write.

When I Was Twenty-five, I Went On Exactly Four Dates With A Much Older Guy Whom I'll Call Peter Parker. I'm Calling Him Peter Parker Because The Actual Guy's Name Was Also Alliterative, And Because, Well, It's My Book And I'll Name A Guy I Dated After Spider-man's Alter Ego If I Want To.

If I Could Make A Device Where People Could Just Intuit Everything You Are Thinking - A Little Cable You Plug Into, Like, A Usb Port, I Would Make A Billion Dollars.