I Think That Celebrities Are

Whatever It Is You Want To Do, Take A Job In That Field. You Will Learn By Experience And, Slow And Steady, You'll Get It Done!

It Only Looks Like I Get To Eat A Lot Of Food On Tv. I Really Just Get The One Bite And The Crew And Guests Eat Everything Else.

I Don't Have To Write Jokes. I Don't Have To Write Insults. If You Ask The Man Of The Hour In The Hot Seat, My Mere Existence Is Clearly Insult Enough.

I Live In, Literally, The Same Home When I Was Swiping My First Bank Card And Wondering If I'd Have To Put Back The Charmin. We Still Don't Have A Dishwasher. My Mom Has Done All These Gardens So Now My House Looks Like The Garden Shack In The Middle Of Versailles.

You Don't Feel As Self-conscious If Your Clothes Fit.