I Would Have To Commit

If You See Me Doing A New Stand-up Special, It Probably Means I've Been Out Of Work For A While.

If You Had No Enemies, You Had No Fun.

I Always Hated The Grateful Dead. Never Even Bought A Led Zeppelin Album.

Did You Ever Notice They Never Take Any Fat Hostages? You Never See A Guy Coming Out Of Lebanon Going: "i Was Held Hostage For Seven Months And I Lost 175 Pounds, I Feel Good And I Look Good And I Learned Self-discipline. That's The Important Thing."

I've Only Done Two Other Tv Shows [instead Of Sex&drugs&rock&roll], One Was Rescue Me And The Other Was A Show Called The Job, Which Was At Abc And Only On For Two Seasons.