If She Were A President,

I'm Thirty Years Old, But I Read At The Thirty-four-year-old Level.

I Got Lucky. I Won The San Francisco Stand-up Comedy Competition In 1977 While I Was Still At San Francisco State.

My Obama Is Getting Pretty Good ... I Think I'll Vote For Whoever Makes My Portrayal Easier. It Takes Time To Put Together A Comic Impression. It Takes Time To Recognize The Tics. Right Now, For Instance, I Could Do A Dead- On Paul Ryan And People Wouldn't Recognize It. Personalities Take A While To Sin.

While Many Comics Have A Secret Persona, I Fundamentally Want To Be Myself.

I Know It's A Cliche, But The Whole Family Is Just Whacked. I Mean, We're All Out Of Our Minds. They're The Funniest, Most Eccentric Bizarre People I've Ever Met, My Siblings.