If The Audience Knows You

Even Though Your Kids Will Consistently Do The Exact Opposite Of What You're Telling Them To Do, You Have To Keep Loving Them Just As Much.

We Cannot Afford To Settle For Being Just Average; We Must Learn As Much As We Can To Be The Best That We Can. The Key Word Is Education - Education With Maximum Effort. Without It, We Cannot Be In Charge Of Ourselves Or Anyone Else.

As A Comedian, I Can Walk Out In Front Of 5000 People And Not Worry About A Thing. Not A Thing, Believe Me. But To Stand Up A Face A Camera And Crew Of Maybe 15 Guys And Get Up Tight About It - To Me That's Weird.

Children Today Know More About Sex Than I Or My Father Did.

My Children Love My Mother, And I Tell My Children, That Is Not The Same Woman I Grew Up With...that Is An Old Woman Trying To Get Into Heaven Now.