I'm A Schizophrenic Mix Of

As A Five-year-old In Berlin In 1965, I Didn't Know That Funny Women Existed. It Wasn't Until I Got Back To England That I Realised Women Could Be Funny.

I Don't Do Marriage. I Think It's Incredibly Naff. And I Don't Like Vulgar Displays Of Ostentation.

My Daughter Has Always Had A Strong Sense Of Her Own Identity. From The Day She Was Born Her Father And I Were In Love With And In Awe Of Her And Still Are.

I Wouldn't Say I Was Grumpy. It's More Pathological - I Have Seismic Tantrums. I Get Red In The Face And Cry At Least Three Times A Week, And I Have To Lie Down And Have A Nap Afterwards.

Women Are More Emotional, And It's Natural To Talk About It.