I'm An Old Newspaper-man Myself,

I Began My Show Business Career Playing Violin In San Francisco At The Corner Of Market And Taylor. I Understand That There Is A Theater There Now.

Try Saving When Your Salary Is Low. So After Making More Money, You Will Not Be Able To Do This Anywhere

Any Man Who Would Walk Five Miles Through The Snow, Barefoot, Just To Return A Library Book So He Could Save Three Cents - That's My Kind Of Guy.

I Feel Responsible For Johnny Ray's Success. See Many Years Ago I Asked Him To Be On My Show And He Asked For A Lot Of Money And I Cried. And He Stole That From Me.

When Another Comedian Has A Lousy Show, I'm The First One To Admit It.