I'm Getting Fat ... As

I Am A Guy Who Talks About Bacon And Escalators.

Babies, They Learn How To Walk And They Are Already Trying To Run Away. You Can't Reach The Doorknob, You Only Know Us, Think It Through.

I Love My Career, But I Feel Like You've Got To Babysit A Lot Of Aspects Of Things. Assuming That Things Will Be Handled Properly Is Just Naive. But I Think That's Anyone's Life, Right? Even If You're Running A Construction Site, It Doesn't Matter If You've Been Doing It For 20 Years, You're Still Going To Be Blindsided By Someone's Incompetence Or Indifference.

Whenever You Go Out To Eat You Gotta Get The Appetizer. 'cause The Appetizer's Just An Excuse For An Extra Meal. You're Always Like "lets See, I Will Start With The 80 Buffalo Wings...and Do You Have A Low-cal Blue Cheese? 'cause I Don't Wanna Fill Up Too Much."

Imagine You're Drowning, And Someone Hands You A Baby.