In My Old Neighborhood, A

My Grandpa Didn't Believe In Hugging And Kissing, Or Saying I Love You. His Love Had To Do With The Way He Treated You. When He Said, We're Going Here, We're Going There, He Was Telling Me About Life. That Was His Love For Me. My Love For Him Was Listening To What He Said, Keeping Out Of Trouble, Doing Right, Being Fair.

I Was'nt Always Black. There Was This Freckel That Just Grew And Grew.

And To Those People With No Children But Who Think They'd Like To Have Them Some Day To Fulfill Their Lives. Remember: With Fulfillment Comes Responsibility.

My Mother Was An Authority On Pig Sties. This Is The Worst Looking Pigsty I Have Ever Seen In My Life, And I Want It Cleaned Up Right Now.

As A Comedian, I Can Walk Out In Front Of 5000 People And Not Worry About A Thing. Not A Thing, Believe Me. But To Stand Up A Face A Camera And Crew Of Maybe 15 Guys And Get Up Tight About It - To Me That's Weird.