In Pizza Express You Can

Say What You Want About The Deaf.

I Used To Buy Lottery Tickets Every Week Until I Realised You Could Watch It On Tv For Nothing.

The Tragedy For Comedians Is There's Nothing More They Want Than To Be Liked. We Desperately Seek Approval. It's Almost Like A Personality Disorder You Can Do As A Job.

My Mum Told Me The Best Time To Ask My Dad For Anything Was During Sex. Not The Best Advice I'd Ever Been Given. I Burst In Through The Bedroom Door Saying "can I Have A New Bike?". He Was Very Upset. His Secretary Was Surprisingly Nice About It. I Got The Bike.

It's So Clear Cut With A Comedian - You Have That Reflex Action, Whereby You Laugh Or You Don't. And So You Either Love Us Or You Simply Cannot See Why People Are Laughing.