It Wasn't That No One

My Parents Always Told Me I Could Do Anything, But Never Told Me How Long It Would Take

I Don't Think Jogging Is Healthy, Especially Morning Jogging. If Morning Joggers Knew How Tempting They Looked To Morning Motorists, They Would Stay Home And Do Sit-ups.

I Was A Vegetarian Until I Started Leaning Toward The Sunlight.

I Have Too Many Credit Cards. You Know What Happened? Someone Stole One And I Didn't Notice. I Noticed When I Got That Bill. Whoa! It Was So Much Less! I'm Letting Him Keep It. I'm Saving Money!

Nobody Is Really Happy With What's On Their Head. People With Straight Hair Want Curly, People With Curly Want Straight, And Bald People Want Everyone To Be Blind.