Listening Is More Important Than

I Sing In The Car If I'm In La, Because You're Like Soundproofed.

The White House Encouraged Tom Brady To Be More Of A Role Model. They Would've Said More, But There Was A Drunken Secret Service Agent Streaking Across The Rose Garden.

Democrats Have Been Doing Everything They Can To Get Young People And College Students To Vote In The Midterms. Though If You Want Students To Participate In Something, Maybe You Shouldn't Call Them Midterms.

It's Something I Worry About When I'm Working Out. I Don't Want To Get Too Fit. Because I Don't Want The New Davinci Of This Millennium To Say, "you. I Have Found My Muse. I Have To Sculpt You."

According To A New Report, Since He's Been Governor, Chris Christie Has Spent $82,000 At A Concession Stand At Metlife Stadium. Now, I Know It Seems Like The Perfect Story For A Chris Christie Joke But I'm Actually On A Chris Christie Joke Diet. So Nothing For Me, Thanks.