Mitt Romney Said He's Not

While I Was Gone, I Had Quintuple Bypass Surgery On My Heart. Plus, I Got A Haircut.

Arnold Schwarzenegger Met With President Bush. It's Amazing If You Think About It. It Was The Terminator And The One-term-inator.

Today Would Have Been The Birthday Of Osama Bin Laden. It Makes Me Remember When Seal Team 6 Threw Him A Surprise Party.

There Is No Off Position On The Genius Switch.

A Guy In Pennsylvania Was Arrested Because He Was Drunk In His Golf Cart Going From Bar To Bar. So They Arrested Him. I Said: Wait A Minute. Isn't That Golf?