Mona Lisa Looks As If

Consider The Public. Never Fear It Nor Despise It. Coax It, Charm It, Interest It, Stimulate It, Shock It Now And Then If You Must, Make It Laugh, Make It Cry, But Above All Never, Never, Never Bore The Living Hell Out Of It.

As One Gets Older, One Discovers Everything Is Going To Be Exactly The Same With Different Hats On.

An Infant Prodigy Of Nine Is Shoved Upon The Stage In White. She Starts Off In A Dismal Whine About A Dark And Stormy Night, A Burglar, Whose Heart Is True, Despite His Wicked-looking Face, Who Puts The Little Child In Doom, To Save Her Mamma's Jewel Case. This May Bring Tears To Every Eye; It Does Not Set My Heart On Fire. I'd Like To Stand Serenely By And Watch That Horrid Child Expire.

I Will Accept Anything In The Theatre . . . Provided It Amuses Or Moves Me. But If It Does Neither, I Want To Go Home.

You Kissed Me Because You Were Awfully Nice And I Was Awfully Nice And We Both Liked Kissing Very Much. It Was Inevitable.