My Brothers Went To Work

You Often Hear That People Go Into Show Business To Find The Love They Never Had When They Were Children. Never Believe It! Every Comic And Most Of The Actors I Know Had A Childhood Full Of Love. Then They Grew Up And Found Out That In The Grown-up World, You Don't Get All That Love, You Just Get Your Share. So They Went Into Show Business To Recapture The Love They Had Known As Children When They Were The Center Of The Universe.

You're Always A Little Disappointing In Person Because You Can't Be The Edited Essence Of Yourself.

I Try To Give My Work Everything I've Got, Because When You're Dead Or You're Out Of The Business Or You're In An Old Actors' Home Somewhere, If You've Done A Good Job, Your Work Will Still Be 16 Years Old And Dancing And Healthy And Pirouetting And Arabesquing All Over The Place. And They'll Say, "that's Who He Is! He's Not This Decaying Skeleton."

Tragedy Is When I Cut My Finger. Comedy Is When You Fall Into An Open Sewer And Die.

The Only Thing We Don't Have A God For Is Premature Ejaculation... But I Hear That It's Coming Quickly.