My Friend Has Hand Soap

The Difference Between A Child's Toy And An Adult Toy Is: Location, Location, Location.

100% Of The People Who Give 110% Do Not Understand Math.

I Think The Best Thing About Being Dumb Is That It Makes Magic A Lot Better. Where The Hell Did That Rat Come From? I Dunno, But I'm Calling The Cops Because He Just Cut That Lady In Half.

To Me, Comedy Is A Game.

It Would Be Nice If People Said, God Bless You Not Just When You Sneezed But Also When You Farted.