My Life Has Changed. I'm

I've Always Loathed Rich People, So I've Become Who I've Loathed, Which Makes It Doubly Difficult, If You Can Follow Me.

Most Practical Jokes, I'll Feel Too Bad For The Other Person So I'll Stop Just Before The Punchline.

I Tolerate Lactose Like I Tolerate People.

The Closest I Ever Came To Death Was Masturbating With A 104-degree Temperature.

My Life Has Changed. I'm Not Walking Around Any More Wishing I Wasn't Me, Which Was The Case At One Time.