Number One Way Life Would

Tourists - Have Some Fun With New York's Hard-boiled Cabbies. When You Get To Your Destination, Say To Your Driver, "pay? I Was Hitchhiking."

Mayor De Blasio Has Legalized Ferrets. Now You Can Legally Own Ferrets In New York City. I Want To Tell You Something. If I Want To See Anymore Beady-eyed Little Weasels, I'll Just Keep Riding The Subway.

You Know, Barack Obama The Last Ten Days Was Traveling Overseas Campaigning In Europe And Everywhere. It Was So Successful, Campaigning Abroad, That He Is Actually Thinking About Campaigning Here In The United States.

I Vote Democrat Because I'm Not Concerned About Millions Of Babies Being Aborted So Long As We Keep All Death Row Inmates Alive And Comfy.

New York Now Leads The World's Great Cities In The Number Of People Around Whom You Shouldn't Make A Sudden Move.