People Tend To Call Me

Along With The 97 Percent Of Women Who Can See, I Have Never Been A Fan Of Redheaded Men.

Nothing Is More American Than Stuffing Your Face With Loaded Potato Skins While Drinking Loaded Mudslides.

I Was Tortured, And Probably Half Of It Was Deserved, But I Was Bullied — So Much So That There Were Days When I Was Like, 'i Can't Go To School Today.' I Was Too Scared.

I Had To Sit Down And Explain To [her Friend] That Aa Was For Quitters

Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea. Please Get Me Out Of Jail And I Promise I Will Never Drink Again. Drink And Drive. I Will Never Drink And Drive Again. I May Even Start My Own Group Fashioned After Madd, Mothers Against Drunk Driving, But I'll Call It Awltdash, Alcoholics Who Like To Drink And Stay Home.