Smart Is Knowing If You're

When You Meet Somebody For The First Time, You're Not Meeting Them. You're Meeting Their Representative.

Only Black People In The Whole Neighborhood, So Let's Break It Down: Me, I'm A Decent Comedian, I'm A'ight. Mary J. Blige, One Of The Greatest R&b Singers To Ever Walk The Earth. Jay-z, One Of The Greatest Rappers To Ever Live. Eddie Murphy, One Of The Funniest Actors To Ever, Ever Do It. Do You Know What The White Man That Lives Next Door To Me Does For A Living? He's A F*****g Dentist.

Oprah Is So Rich, I Saw John Kerry Proposing To Her.

The Thing I Try To Get Across To The Writers - And I Do A Lot Of Writing, Too - Is That When I Do Stand-up, Nothing I Talk About Is Funny. Everything Is Really Sad And Tragic And Then I Make It Funny.

It's My Real Name. My Mother's Name Is Rose Rock. It Was The Worst Name As A Kid To Have. They Called Me Piece Of The Rock, Plymouth Rock, Joe Rockid, And Flintstones. Now They Call Me Mister Rock.