Snake Eyes Is A Gambling

Alcoholism Is The Only Disease That You Can Get Yelled At For Having.

You Know When They Have A Fishing Show On Tv? They Catch The Fish And Then Let It Go. They Don't Want To Eat The Fish, They Just Want To Make It Late For Something.

How Does A Sesame Seed Stick To A Bun? That's Magical. There Must Be Some Sesame Seed Glue Out There. Either That Or They're Adhesive On One Side. Peel Off The Backing, Place It On The Bun.

I Went To The Park And Saw This Kid Flying A Kite. The Kid Was Really Excited. I Don't Know Why, That's What They're Supposed To Do. Now If He Had Had A Chair On The Other End Of That String, I Would Have Been Impressed.

My Apartment Is Infested With Koala Bears. It's The Cutest Infestation Ever. Way Better Than Cockroaches. When I Turn On The Light A Bunch Of Koala Bears Scatter. But I Don't Want 'em To, You Know, I'm Like "hey, Hold On, Fellas. Let Me Hold One Of You. And Feed You A Leaf."