The English Are Terribly Lazy

Professors Of Theory Merely Hold Post-mortems.

A Barber Is By Nature And Inclination A Sport. He Can Tell You At What Exact Hour The Ball Game Is To Begin, Can Foretell Its Issue Without Losing A Stroke Of The Razor, And Can Explain The Points Of Inferiority Of All The Players, As Compared With The Better Men That He Has Personally Seen Elsewhere, With The Nicety Of A Professional.

Golf May Be Played On Sunday, Not Being A Game Within The View Of The Law, But Being A Form Of Moral Effort.

What We Call Creative Work, Ought Not To Be Called Work At All, Because It Isn't. I Imagine That Thomas Edison Never Did A Day's Work In His Last Fifty Years.

The Landlady Of A Boarding-house Is A Parallelogram - That Is, An Oblong Angular Figure, Which Cannot Be Described, But Which Is Equal To Anything