The Essence Of A General's

What Is The Difference Between A Nazi And A Dog?the Nazi Lifts His Arm.

When I Was A Little Boy And Played Liebestraum, My Father Used To Hit Me On The Head With A Newspaper Every Time I Slopped The Cadenza . . . I Hate Liebestraum.

Laughter Is The Closest Distance Between Two People.

I Know [canned Music] Makes Chickens Lay More Eggs And Factory Workers Produce More. But How Much More Can They Get Out Of You On An Elevator?

Did You Know That Mozart Had No Arms And No Legs? I've Seen Statues Of Him On People's Pianos.