The Problem With These Interviews

I Like To Read The Bible In Public Places Where People Are Watching Me Read It. And I Like To Mumur Out To Myself: 'bullshit!'

We All Know How Funny Morrissey Is. Actually, You Know What? I Say That Sarcastically. His Songs Are Some Of The Funniest Songs I've Ever Heard In My Life. I Mean, Really. I Mean, Not That The "girlfriend In A Coma" Is, Like, Really Funny.

I Have A 60-acre Farm In North Carolina, And I Have A Tractor And A Farmhouse. As Soon As I Groom The Land, I Want To Put Cabins Around And Have A Place Where People Can Write And Hang Out. It'll Be Either That Or An All-black Nudist Colony.

My Brother Has Add, Which Is Weird Because He Drives A Ford Focus. I Told My Brother That Joke But He Didn't Laugh Because He Got Distracted By My Shoe Strings.

I Live In Los Angeles And I Had Been Drinking One Night, So I Was On The Walk Of Fame And I Saw Tony Danza's Star And I Started Urinating On It. Just Yelling Out, 'who's The Boss Now?'