The Surest Way To Make

In Milwaukee Last Month A Man Died Laughing Over One Of His Own Jokes. That's What Makes It So Tough For Us Outsiders. We Have To Fight Home Competition.

A Man Of Forty Today Has Nothing To Worry Him But Falling Hair, Inability To Button The Top Button, Failing Vision, Shortness Of Breath, A Tendency Of The Collar To Shut Off All Breathing, Trembling Of The Kidneys To Whatever Tune The Orchestra Is Playing, And A General Sense Of Giddiness When The Matter Of Rent Is Brought Up. Forty Is Life's Golden Age.

The Only Cure For A Real Hangover Is Death.

I Haven't Been Abroad In So Long That I Almost Speak English Without An Accent Now.

Drinking Makes Such Fools Of People, And People Are Such Fools To Begin With That It's Compounding A Felony.