The Universe Is Very, Very

They Say Give A Man A Fish And He'll Eat For A Day. But Teach A Man To Fish And He'll Get His Own Show On The Discovery Channel.

I Dropped Out Of High School When I Was 16, After I Had A Huge Argument With My English Teacher Over The Meaning Of The Word 'existentialism.'

It Turns Out That Speeding Irresponsibly In A Large Truck, Placing Personal Wealth Ahead Of The Welfare Of Others, Is One Of The Greatest Sins In The Universe.

It 's The Time Of Year When Canadians Mate.

The Worst Gift I Was Given Is When I Got Out Of Rehab That Christmas; A Bottle Of Wine. It Was Delicious.