There's A Lot More To

I Have Horrible Stage Fright - You Know How You Go Through The Bi-polar Stage Fright Thing? Then You Go On Drugs To Get Over The Stage Fright And Perform, But Then You're Not Funny At All.

Women Complain About Pms, But I Think Of It As The Only Time Of The Month When I Can Be Myself.

I Avoided Reality For Most Of My Life. But Once You Deal With It, It's Kind Of Cool.

I Actually Get More Conservative When I'm In Vegas.

I Say I'm The Only Serious Comedian In The Presidential Race. And I'd Like To Take This Opportunity To Ask Both Romney And Obama To Debate Me. Because I Think That Both Of Those Guys - I Think That The American People Are Being Given A False Choice, Because The Choice Between The Lesser Of Two Evils Is A False Choice.