To Barbecue Is A Way

Congealed Fat Is Pretty Much The Same, Irrespective Of The Delicacy Around Which It Is Concealed.

There's No Law That Decrees When Not To Whinge, But You Reach A Certain Age - 80 Seems About Right - When You're Expected To Manifest Querulousness - The Coffee's Too Hot, The Boiled Egg's Too Soft.

If You Mind Losing More Than You Enjoy Winning, Don't Bet.

I Was Going To Talk About Nicholas Parsons' Ignorance, But 18 Seconds Would Be A Wholly Insufficient Time.

If Anyone Tells Me I'm Fat, I Say, - That's Because Every Time I Make Love To Your Wife, She Gives Me A Biscuit