We All Know What We're

We Heard Her Come Halfway Up The Stairs, Where She Must Have Seen The Bedroom Light On. Again, The Normal Parent Reaction Would Have Been To Say Something Like, "you Had Better Come Out This Moment Or I Am Releasing The Tiger!" But Debbie Was Not A Normal Parent, So We Heard Her Gigle And Creep Away, Saying, "shhh! Rachel! Come With Mommy! Stuart Is Busy!

Life Is Always Going To Be A Series Of Ouch-making Moments, And The Question Was, Was I Going To Go All Fetal Position, Or Was I Going To Woman Up? I Went Into Fetal Position On The Bed To Think About This. Fetal Position Turned Out To Be Very Comfortable.

She Introduced Herself To My Parents With One Of Her Mighty, Bunny-crushing Handshakes. (i'd Never Seen Claudia Crush A Bunny, To Be Fair, But That's The Approximate Level Of Pressure.)

Hey! Jack The Wanker! Over Here! I Want Your Autograph!

Kissing Is Something That Makes Up For A Lot Of Other Crap You Have To Put Up With...it Can Be Confusing And Weird And Awkward, But Sometimes It Just Makes You Melt And Forget Everything That Is Going On.