We Must Remember That As

Having A Comic In The White House Will Assure Stability In Foreign Relations. The World Will Continue To Respond To Foreign Initiatives By Saying, 'you Must Be Joking.'

Worrying About The Future Is A Thing Of The Past. I Don't Think About It.

It Is True That All Of The Current Presidential Candidates Once Denied That They Had Any Intention Of Running. But The Fact That I Am Also A Liar, Doesn't Make Me A Candidate.

Now That My Wine Has Been Served In The White House, Why Not Me? Who Could Talk To Farmers Better Than I? Somebody Even Asked Me The Other Day If I Had Anything In My Platform About Taxes. 'hell Yes,' I Said. 'great State. But I Wouldn't Want To Live There.'

Many Of You Have Asked Why It's Taken Me So Long To Select A Running Mate. I Have No Intention Of Reaching Into The Political Grab Bag And Grabbing Any Man To Be My Running Mate. I'm Going To Reach In And Grab A Woman!